This is something that I used to call the Trap. The trap was that if I could just have better thoughts about my life, about my job or my relationships, about Pain then I would feel better. I always thought that if I could change my thoughts, upgrade them as it were I would do better and so acceptance was a better, more spiritual way to go. It seemed so virtuous and there were plenty of techniques and gurus out there pushing these ideas that kept me innocently looking in the wrong direction. I didn't realize that trying to improve my thoughts was just the same misunderstanding, the same trap as trying to change my circumstances in order to feel and do better. It was just more thinking!
Seeing that there is a place beyond thought, that is safe, calm, and quiet, that is always available and I don't need to do anything to get there, I got to see that all those things I wanted to have better thinking about were also made of thought.
"Hold on, are you saying Pain is made of thought? My Pain is real!!"
Actually yes, because there isn't anything that isn't thought so that has to include pain. We only feel pain when it comes into consciousness and when it does it is, well, it's really painful but having better thinking about it is only going to improve things a little. Wanting things to be different than they are is only going to keep us in fight or flight.
Understanding that you are always ok and that you are safe takes us to a place beyond the illusion created by thoughts. Yes, an illusion. If pain can only be felt when it comes into consciousness and we get to chose what we want to focus our thinking on then you can look beyond the busy mind, the techniques, the better thinking, and you will see you don't have to be afraid of it. You don't need to be better or think better, you already are.
With love Chana.
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